“She keeps yelling that she hates me.”
“Every conversation turns into an argument.”
“I try to help, but she just pushes me away.”
My heart went out to the mother. She sat so helpless and lost. Her 15-year-old daughter seemed to be angry and constantly irritated. “Everything I say angers her; I feel like I’ve failed her,” she whispered.
If you relate to this, please know you are not alone.
Many loving parents feel helpless during their child’s teenage years. The child who once held your hand now pulls away, has no qualms in expressing their anger slamming doors, and saying things that hurt.
But this painful distance doesn’t mean you’ve failed. It means your teen is growing—testing limits, forming identity, and wondering: “Will you still love me when I push you away?”
What can I possibly do?
Firstly, stop blaming yourself. It’s a phase. But for sure, do not match their anger with your anger. Be the calm person they can come back to. If you feel you can’t, then take your time and deal with it when you are calmer.
Make her feel heard and not judged.
Talk when you both are calm, during walks, car- rides or casual moments. Make them feel respected and heard according to their age and not treat them like kids. They need us to be emotionally and physically present and available to them.
Always let them know – I’m here when you are ready to talk.
Your teens need your love, and unwavering support even if they don’t say it.
Just be there, keep showing up. That’s what matters most.
